Divorce Attorney In Chicago Mental Effects of Divorce on Children
By: Seth Fleming | Posted: 25th May 2011
The emotional effects of divorce on children is something that most parents worry about. This may change their minds against having a divorce. Parents may be plagued with how divorce is affecting their children when they recognize that it is the only way to go.
Parents should then have a clear idea of what exactly the psychological effects of divorce on their children may be. They can make a sound decision about it and work throughout divorce to minimize or avoid them altogether once the proceedings start.
Rejected
The children of the divorce are left feeling rejected and unloved by the parent who has left. The reason for this is because children consider themselves as the center if the universe. Thus; they are the reason that causes everything to happen.
At fault
As a result of this, the children may think that something they said or did, or just the way they are, may have been the cause of the divorce and leave them feeling a deep sense of guilt and shame. Even difficult teens may be afraid that their behavior has contributed to the divorce and made it easier for a parent to leave.
Powerless
Because they believe that they are responsible for the problems, children also believe that they can fix things. They may go to great lengths to be a “better child”, a more helpful and appealing child, or believe they have the power to “wish” their parents back together again. The children feel powerless and upset that they cannot make a difference, when this does not happen or when their often elaborate plans and hopes for reconciliation fail.
Stressed
Children may feel stressed and under pressure to do more than they can realistically cope with at a time that is already stressful enough during divorce. For instance, they may volunteer to take on extra duties at home or be burdened with extra responsibilities like it or not. A role that even teens are not qualified for or comfortable with is being used as a confidante and advisor by one or both parents. Eager to help out and seem “grown up,” they may hide how stressed they really are.
Lonely
The loneliness may overcome children of divorce. What they may really be missing is the intimacy, comfort and particular parenting skills of the absent parent. The parent at home may not be available to their children because they are busy dealing with their own problems. They may not have contact with their usual playmates because of what is happening around them. The children may end up seeking intimacy elsewhere or become depressed.
Angry
Specific events and changes, emotions that children are not equipped to manage or express, is a common emotional effect of divorce cause anger by a lack of understanding or acceptance of the divorce. You will not always be able to see the anger in children.It is more common when divorce brings a low-conflict marriage to an end because the reasons for the divorce are not so obvious. The children see the divorce as being unnecessary and they hate their parents for it.
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Tags: parents, universe, great lengths, psychological effects, proceedings, sound decision, confidante, reconciliation, unloved